Philosopher Jean-Paul Sartre once said, ‘Everything has been figured out, except how to live.’ This poignant quote speaks to the intricate complexity of what it means to be alive. As we grow and evolve as humans, our own mortality is something each of us must grapple with.
Moving through existential dread can be challenging. And when you experience it amid depression, it may feel incredibly overwhelming. But you can cope with your intense feelings and harness a deeper understanding of yourself and your needs during this time.
Understanding Existential Dread
Existential dread or existential anxiety refers to a general sense of unease associated with being alive. In some cases, it feels mildly unsettling. When it’s more serious, existential dread can cause you to question every part of your identity or life. People of all ages experience existential dread. Even young children experience sadness and anxiety as they understand that life is not finite. As we move through life, such fear and restlessness can become more pronounced.
Some of the overarching themes include:
- Questioning the meaning of life: Why are you here? Does life hold any real sense of purpose? If it does, how do you harness it? If it doesn’t, how do you reconcile that?
- Accepting your own mortality: Acknowledging that everything is fleeting, including the most stable relationships, and death is unavoidable for everyone.
- Sense of isolation: Coming to terms that we ultimately experience existence alone in our bodies, despite the connectivity we share with others.
- Discomfort around significant life decisions: How do you decide how to spend your time? What values are worth cherishing in your own life? When faced with difficult choices, how do you choose the best outcome for yourself? If you made a crucial mistake, how can you cope with that regret and move forward?
The Connection Between Depression and Existential Dread
Most people experience some existential angst from time to time- feeling upset or anxious is not indicative of any specific mental health problem. Likewise, to be human is to question why we’re here and what we’re meant to do on this planet. It is normal to explore the deeper meaning of life and sometimes have negative thoughts about what being alive really entails.
But existential dread can heighten depressive symptoms, and depression can correlate with existential dread. Existential depression sometimes blends various emotional and behavioral characteristics, including:
Apathy: Apathy refers to a pervasive lack of interest or motivation. Apathy sometimes comes in questions like, “what’s the point of doing anything at all?” or, “why does anything matter?” Prolonged apathy can perpetuate a sense of anger, hopelessness, or disconnection.
Suicidal thoughts: Suicide is an incredibly complex topic, but existential struggles may affect your desire to live. It can be challenging to cope with the uncertainty of the future or the pain of the past, and chronic depression can affect your confidence, functioning, and ability to make meaning.
Substance use: Sometimes people try to numb their existential concerns with drugs, alcohol, or other escape mechanisms. Substances provide temporary relief and pleasure, but they often lead to more distress and shame.
Anxiety symptoms: Anxiety and depressive symptoms often go hand-in-hand, and existential dread may cause you to agonize over the unanswerable questions of life. This can result in panic attacks, losing touch with reality (dissociation), rumination, and chronic worrying.
Tips for Reconciling Existential Crises
An existential crisis can feel unnerving, but it can offer a valuable opportunity for deeper self-awareness and reflection. If you’re struggling with distressing existential thoughts, the following may help:
Allow yourself to lean into the discomfort: Fear is always a valid emotion, and it deserves to be witnessed and embodied. In simple words, this means you have permission to feel scared. You’re allowed to worry about your life purpose or what the universe really has in store for you. This is part of the collective human experience, and honoring that can help you feel less isolated from your feelings. Remember that you don’t necessarily have to act on how you feel. You have freedom to decide what you want to do next.
Focus on what you can control: Ultimately, we all have such little control. But you can focus on a few important things, including how you choose to act in the present moment, how you manage feelings when they arise, and whether you choose
Embrace deeper conversations with trusted loved ones: We’re all asking ourselves various existential questions from time to time. Talking openly with friends and family undoes some of the aloneness associated with this unease.
Lean into the present moment: Mindfulness is one of best ways to slow down anxious thoughts or unsettled feelings. If you experience existential depression, it’s easy to get “lost” in your own fears or angst. Instead, try to pause. Slow down. Savor your favorite food. Embrace nurturing relationships with people who make you laugh and feel good about yourself. Immerse yourself in awe. Spend time in nature. Cuddle your pets. And when all else feels challenging, just breathe.
Allow yourself to grieve: Existential uncertainty sometimes emerges during the grief process. Losing a loved one can call everything into question. However, going through your feelings is one of the best gifts you can give yourself. If you feel stuck, grief therapy offers compassion and guidance during this tender time.
Aim to reconcile regret: You can’t undo your past choices, and there will always be life paths that part of you wishes you took. This is also what it means to be human. Almost everyone can resonate with feeling regret. If you experienced existential dread over the past, consider spending some time reflecting on what you gleaned from those decisions. If anything, how did they help you grow? Is there anywhere you can practice some gratitude? And if trauma occurred for no apparent reason, how can you gently remind yourself it was never your fault, and you did nothing wrong?
Let go of needing to “solve” the crisis: Existential dread isn’t necessarily something that needs to be solved, fixed, or erased. There is nothing wrong with feeling unsettled sometimes. There is also nothing wrong with questioning purpose in meaning in life. Paradoxically, making more space for it can help you embrace some of the uncertainty.
Support for Existential Concerns in Austin, TX
Significant life events, including the death of a loved one, retirement, or changing careers can sometimes trigger existential dread. These profound feelings are not indicative of any moral failing, and they can be a standard experience associated with moving through various life stages.
However, pervasive existential dread may cause you to feel hopeless or overly anxious in daily life. It may affect your personal relationships or self-esteem, and it can perpetuate emotional distress.
That said, therapy offers a supportive environment for exploring your existential questioning. Together, we can safely explore the nature of your existential thoughts and help you feel more empowered in your life. Even if we don’t find “all the answers,” you may find it easier to start sitting with some of the unknown. Please contact me today to learn more and get started.